There is this thought, or idea about there being an ideal guy or a perfect girl for you. The question was possed to me, "is my expectation in a future spouse unreal? Is it crazy to wait for this person I imagine?"
I don't have an answer. At least not a yes or no type answer. It's more, well? Um... Maybe we should talk about what you are expecting and what you think ideal is?
I am not a romantic. I live in more of a realistic world. Love is more than thinking romance is flowers, elaborate vacations, a picture of walking down the beach hand in hand. That's all amazing, I am not putting it down because I am a guy. Romance for me is more than coming home to my Stepford wife who's fixing my favorite meal and has my frosted mug ready to go. Whatever your thought of romance is just do yourself a favor and chuck it out the window.
Romance is waking up early on your day off to drive your sagnificant other to work cause of the bad weather. It's picking up chocolate milk on your way home cause you know it's their favorite. It's staying out until 3 in the morning to see a movie primier even though you have to be at work at 8:30. Romance, love, expectations? It should always be based more in the little things. The little things show you are paying attention to your other half. You are aware of who they are as a person. You understand them cause you are spending time continually getting to know them.
The question though was about expectations. It was about waiting for this individual you have imagined. My reality with marriage is simple, it's amazing! I love being married. I love doing life with Ashley. I love how we both challenge each other, grow together, hurt together, and encourage each other. The other reality though is whomever you end up spending your life with will hurt you, they will disappoint you, they will put their personal needs and wants above yours. I don't believe in a checklist for a future spouse. What I do hold to, as a Christian, is they love God and love others. In their pursuit of God they learn how to more affectionately love and serve the person they are with and others around them.
Checklist in a future spouse:
1) love God
2) love others
3) be passionate in their pursuit of God
All else you learn to adapt to. You learn to walk through. You learn to embrace their flaws, their failures, and their love for you.
Much love to you on this December day,